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Dilating Diaries: 6th January 2021

Welcome back to the real world! Christmas is over, the last of the Turkey has gone, we're in the New Year, everyone is still planning to be their best selves! Ah the naivety.

It's the first proper week back at work for me. I did work a few days over Christmas but let's be honest it was about 1 hour of work each day followed by 7 hours of expertly pushing my mouse around to make my status look green while swigging my coffee and Baileys. And when I say 'back at work', of course I mean sitting in a slightly different room to normal. My commute is approximately 3 seconds. Never thought I'd miss the Tube.

In other news the Covid situation has, as we all suspected, escalated wildly since early December. This is day two of our third full lockdown in England. I hope you are all healthy and safe and I'm praying this will carry us through to a better spring. Please think of the vulnerable in society and follow the rules.

Dilating Progress

In vaginismus world, there's nothing exceptional to report this week other than the fact that I'm finally managing to keep up my dilating routine every other day (more or less). Which when you look at my track record is actually very bloody exceptional.

I've been doing lots of self-pep-talk things this week, working on trying to be more positive about dilating rather than resenting it all the time. I'm not quite there yet but it does help me to just snap myself out of it tell myself its just 1 hour and not a big deal. Basically being realistic rather than catastrophising, which is much more my style.

I set my 2021 goals at the weekend which I feel good about. I'm very aware that I set quite a long list because I figured 12 months is a long time. HOWEVER. I need to remember not to be too hard on myself next January if I didn't meet all of them. Please remind me of this!!

The only thing I utterly failed to do this week was do some ART. Which is the only fun thing on my list ever, so I don't know why I fail all the time. So I'm going to do that for the rest of the evening and binge some Netflix over a spicy ginger beer.

Looking ahead to next week:

I'm PMSing so just keeping it simple next week, nothing fancy:

  • Keep going with dilating

  • Attend the Vaginismus Network Webinar (exciting!!)

  • Continue to be positive about dilating (urgh, it's just so hard though)

Stay safe & see you next week!


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